Surviving a Heart Attack

19 04 2010

“It’s the big one, Elizabeth!”

Fred Sanford

A good friend of mine had a heart attack yesterday morning. Thankfully, he survived the attack and the resulting medical procedure and is now recuperating in the hospital for a few days.

It reminded me of my own heart attack ten years ago, which resulted in angioplasty and two stents. Since then, I’ve had three more angioplasty procedures, one just a year ago, and picked up an additional four stents—quite the collection.

On the whole, I’ve not felt the same sense. I’m sure some people probably do, but I haven’t. For starters, I’m generally weaker and I tend to tire more easily than I did before the attack. I don’t hit a golf ball quite as far as I did, nor can I easily toss fertilizer bags over my shoulder and load them in the car. A day of heavy gardening or heavy any other kind of work is pretty much out of the question.

Is it the heart attack or the fact that I’m getting older? Probably a little of both, I surmise, but there is no doubt that the heart attack took a toll on me physically and mentally.

Another after effect of a heart attack is the guilt-o-gram for eating a heart healthy diet. Right after the attack, when I still believed it would imminently save my life, I was pretty good about eating healthy—low fat with lots of chicken and fish. After awhile, I was adding in some burgers and fries. You know how that works.

Then, of course, there is the plastic pill box with “AM” and “PM” clearly marked for seven days of the week. Pills to control cholesterol, blood pressure, and blood thinning suddenly stock the medicine cabinet and have to be refilled for the rest of your life. Last year, my cardiologist told me to take my latest wonder drug, Plavix (a drug required by the special stents he put in me), everyday, without fail, “even if Jesus comes again!” So, each morning I look heavenward and then pop the Plavix along with the rest of my pills.

The mental effects are subtler, but they’ve been there over the years to be sure. I don’t see how anyone can go through a near-death experience, followed by a week in Intensive Care without experiencing some kind of change in thinking. Of course, as time passes, they aren’t as pronounced as they once were.

A heart attack tends to make a person more emotional. I’m not sure why that is, but it seems to be true, at least in my case. I cry more easily than I did before the attack, which is damn inconvenient at times. Related to that, maybe, is some depression, an after effect confirmed to me by physicians.

Yes, a heart attack lets itself be known in many ways for many years.

My friend, an accomplished landscape artist, will delightfully discover one of the very positive after effects of a heart attack—God’s creation looks even more beautiful than ever. Without a doubt.

I loved his art before. I can’t wait to see what he does now.


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Cancer on the Big Screen and the 18th at Augusta

12 04 2010

Cancer was front and center in our household again over the weekend, but in a very positive way. On Saturday evening, Jane and I went to see a movie called “Letters to God” (Possibility Pictures), and on Sunday we watched Phil Mickelson win an exciting victory at the Masters followed by a very touching embrace between Phil and his cancer-stricken wife, Amy.

“Letters to God” is a movie—filmed in part at the Arnold Palmer Hospital for Children in Orlando—about a 10-year-old boy with terminal cancer who writes letters to God during his illness. His spirit provides the redemptive path for numerous people in the movie including the mailman, but the most fascinating part of the movie to me, were the letters themselves.

His letters reveal how this kid copes with his imminent death and how that might impact his friends and family. It is humbling to watch no matter your circumstances.

The movie was a little “churchy” for my taste, but I was shedding tears along with everyone else in the audience. I identified with much of what happened in the movie. Mostly with the frustrated and angry mom and brother (Robyn Lively and Michael Bolten). Both reach a point in the story where the weight is just too heavy to bear and they lose it. At one point, Mom rebukes her own mother’s attempt to console her with Bible verses. I could sure relate to that.

The boy, Tyler (Tanner Maguire), and his young friend, a girl named Sam (Bailee Madison), are heartwarming. And the boy’s letters are amazing. No wonder Jesus said that unless we become like a child, we couldn’t enter the Kingdom of Heaven. I don’t think he had whiney, screaming childishness in mind when he said that. As you hear the letters of the dying 10-year-old, you will get a pretty good idea of what he does have in mind.

It would be hard for me to watch any movie about cancer without identifying with much of it. It’s the life Jane and I have been living for almost two years. The hurt, the anger, the doubting and pouting, I’ve been through it all. Little Tyler thrills me as he demonstrates faith with a sublime innocence. It makes me want to have that sweet and simple childlike faith again. I’m not sure I can find it. I think it’s in a box stashed away somewhere behind my collection of disappointments.

And then there is my wife Jane, who has awed me as she has faced down this cancer thing over and over again—tumor after tumor, surgery after surgery, chemo after chemo, radiation after radiation—with a faith that has a certain quality that’s rare and exquisite.

And that brings me to the Masters. Last year, Amy Mickelson was diagnosed with cancer and evidently underwent surgery in the summer. I don’t know much more about it than that, because it’s a private affair and I don’t really trust much of what I read about it on the Internet. Whatever she’s been through, it isn’t over. She was too weak to follow Phil in person during his play at the Masters and appeared only as he finished his last hole on the way to victory.

Evidently he was surprised to see her as he walked off the eighteenth green and embraced and kissed her in a very touching moment that couldn’t be hidden from the television cameras.

I was shedding a few tears as I watched the scene and sensed the rush of emotion go through them as they stood there holding on to one another. Perhaps only someone who has been where they have been could fully appreciate that that moment wasn’t about winning the Masters.

Go Phil. Go Amy. You da man!


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Starting Over

5 04 2010

“Live out of your imagination, not your history.”

Stephen Covey

How do we live in the present free from the burdens of past disappointments? Like so much else involved in the survivor mind, it isn’t something that we can just get up and decide to do on any given day, and then scratch it off the list after we do it. Furthermore, we must be aware that those past “demons” will be around for a long time. They don’t go away, but they don’t have to keep us stuck in survival mode.

A break from the past involves a fundamental change in the way we think and live. Essentially, it is starting over. We are used to the concept of starting over when things aren’t right. A composer, a writer, a builder, or a painter might literally trash a work and begin again if it isn’t turning out the way he imagined it. Why can’t we do the same with our mindset? If darkness and disappointment is turning us into something we don’t want to be, why can’t we just paint it over again?

God said something to that effect to one of the prophets. While observing a potter smash his clay down and begin again, the prophet was told, “Can I not do with you as this potter does?”[i]

The believer has a road to renewal that isn’t available to those who are trying to do this in their own way and in their own strength. God is in the renewing business. The Lord is the Lord of starting over. He is the potter; we are the clay.

Forgiveness

Like sugar in a cookie recipe, one of the key ingredients to a new start is forgiveness. The survivor finds herself in need of forgiving herself, forgiving God, and forgiving those who have hurt her. Harboring anger, resentment, and ill will toward any of the above will keep one treading in quicksand. There is no escape.

But, admittedly, forgiveness is rarely easy. And, again, it isn’t something we simply decide to do over breakfast. It comes through much wrestling in our soul, and often takes time and comes in layers rather than one big decision to forgive. But once we truly forgive, we are no longer in bondage to that person or event. We are essentially free to move on.

Let me offer an illustration of how forgiveness might work for most of us mortals. If we are incarcerated, there are basically two ways to freedom. Someone comes along with a key and lets us go. (For some people, perhaps, the process of forgiveness is just that simple.) For many of us, however, we escape by digging our way out with a spoon, and freedom comes slowly.

That might seem like a strange analogy but sometimes that’s the path to the freedom of forgiveness. You start the process. Just start it. Then one day—hopefully sooner rather than later—it is complete and you are truly free.

[i] Jeremiah 18:5


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Easter

4 04 2010

[NOTE: The following post is a devotional that I wrote for Easter, 2001. What a message for going from surviving 2 thriving! A blessed Easter to all!]

As they entered the tomb, they saw a young man dressed in a white robe sitting on the right side, and they were alarmed. “Don’t be alarmed,” he said. “Your are looking for Jesus the Nazarene, who was crucified. He has risen! He is not here. See the place where they laid him. But go, tell his disciples and Peter, ‘He is going ahead of you into Galilee. There you will see him, just as he told you.’”[i]

On that first Easter, the women went looking for Jesus in the tomb. They were “alarmed” to discover that the tomb was empty and became afraid. The disciples had the same experience.

What’s this, an empty tomb? Peter looked where the body of Jesus was supposed to be and went away wondering to himself what had happened. Shortly after that, he was locked away in a room with the other disciples who were hiding out in fear.

The tomb many believe was where the body of Jesus was placed

Then came a life-changing event—they encountered the risen Lord Jesus and received the promised Holy Spirit. Their doubt and fear was replaced by hope and power. Instead of hiding from the Jews and wondering what had happened to Jesus, they went right up to them and fearlessly announced, “We cannot help speaking about what we have seen and heard.”[ii]

I think that many people today are like those disciples on that first Easter morning. Something inside of us sees only an empty tomb while we scratch our heads and wonder what happened. Until by faith we get past the empty tomb and encounter the risen Christ, we will not live as though He lives. When Christ lives, really lives, everything changes. Boldness and power replace alarm and fear. Confidence and hope replace doubt and bewilderment. When we know Christ lives, we live every day accordingly. That means he is Lord. He is calling the shots. His purpose is our purpose. If He lives, then His Word is true and obedience is not optional.

The disciples were able to encounter the risen Jesus face-to-face. Thy touched him and ate with him. However, it is those of us who believe without seeing him who are considered “blessed.”[iii]

And so we look out with the blessed eyes of faith to encounter the Lord Jesus—our living hope and our hope for living. When we see Him, when we know that He lives, our hearts leap with joy, and we simply cannot help speaking about what we have seen and heard.

[i] Mark 16:5-7

[ii] Acts 4:20

[iii] John 20:29


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Living in the Present

30 03 2010

“Future is, of all things, the thing least like eternity. It is the most completely temporal part of time—for the Past is frozen and no longer flows, and the Present is all lit up with eternal rays.[i]”

C. S. Lewis

Moving on is important. But it isn’t the goal. Getting to a point where we are living again with some measure of joy and gratification is. When we are no longer in a state of shielding ourselves from pain, we can begin to live life like we are living rather than merely existing. That would be the beginning of thriving.

You will determine the definition of thriving for you. There is no litmus test for that kind of living. For me, it would be once again living with peace about where and who I am, and having a positive impact on others. That is what the ministry was about for me and what I want to characterize my life.

When I was deep in survival mode after the collapse of my ministry, I didn’t care about influencing anyone. I wasn’t all that concerned about the pain and struggles of others. I was just living for me. And let me tell you, that kind of living isn’t thriving.

Life beyond surviving must include breaking our bondage to past events. If we continue to live in the past, we will never move on, much less thrive. The very nature of thriving includes living for today with a hope for tomorrow.

I’m amazed at the number of people who persistently live either in “the good old days,” or they are haunted by past mistakes, failures, or traumatic events. That accomplishes nothing but anchoring them in their current discontent or misery.

We all have our defining moments—those major events in our past that stay with us. Some of them are positive and heartwarming: the first kiss, the birth of a child, a wedding, a graduation, etc. Some are dark and stressful: abuse or assault, an affair, a death, and the like.

Although recalling memories, good or bad, is natural, we simply cannot let memories constantly affect how we live in the present. For example, I’ve known many people who are so bitter about a divorce that they spend every waking moment hating their ex and attempting to persuade everyone else to do the same. Virtually every conversation is laced with anti-ex rhetoric. In short, their lives are about what was, not what is or what is to come.

Essential for moving on is a break with whatever has a hold on us in our past. We can go nowhere as long as we are chained to past events.

At this point, I must comment on our God’s boundless love and forgiveness. God has no problem forgiving our past mistakes, but we do. And for those living in the “good old days,” God has no program for that. Life is constantly moving on, and never living in the way things were.

I had plenty of people in my ministry that could never get over how things “used to be” in the church. Some were so consumed with the past that they made every effort to bring down the new because it wasn’t the old. People like this accomplish nothing but spreading the seeds of discontent and thwarting the amazing wonders that God has in store for us in the present.

Living in the past keeps us from moving ahead and seizing the day, so-to-speak. Our insides churn because of past mistakes or events, and we never experience any real happiness or lightness in the present. The past dictates our present.

One way I used to deal with past events and present pain was to look forward to something in the future. In a way, this is a curse in itself, because I was living for something else than what I had. I was going to move here or there and do this or that, and then life would be good. As the French philosopher, Blaise Pascal, said,

“The present is never our goal: the past and the present are our means: the future alone is our goal. Thus, we never live but we hope to live; and always hoping to be happy, it is inevitable that we will never be so.”

It’s a sad way of looking at life, but it’s been my experience that there can be a lot of truth in what he said.

Neither living in the past nor living in anticipation of the future is thriving. Thriving is living today without the burdens of the past or counting on better days ahead. Today is the day in which we live, love, serve, and enjoy. Or as the Psalmist states it, “This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.”[ii]

Although the Scriptures are filled with hope and promise for the future, the exhortation for living this present life is to live for today. [iii] Hope is something realized in the future, but it affects how we live today. Or at least that seems to be what the biblical writers had in mind.

All this reminds me of a restaurant in Austin, Texas. They had a sign hanging out in their patio that was little more than a rock garden with tables and chairs. The sign read, “ROCK THROWING ALLOWED TOMORROW ONLY.” Ohhhh, so I can’t toss rocks until tomorrow!

Of course each day I try to pick up a rock, the sign still says tomorrow only. Rock throwing never comes.

When we live for tomorrow, neither does living.

[i] C. S. Lewis, The Screwtape Letters, MacMillan 1961, p. 68.

[ii] Psalm 118:24

[iii] James 4:13-15, Matthew 6:34


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In it for the long haul

19 03 2010

“Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream.”

W. C. Fields

Is he in it for the long haul?

From first dates to hiring interviews to allies in war, we want to know the answer to the question. It’s important to know before we invest too much into a relationship. If the answer is “no,” that might be perfectly acceptable in some circumstances, but it is something we want to know now, not later. Am I right?

I’ve observed that online dating sites, by their nature, tend to work against the long haul relationship, no matter what they claim. Think about it. Online matching sites have created a “shopping mall” approach to dating. When we shop at a mall, we look around until we find items that look appealing, try on a bunch of stuff, toss some back on the rack, and finally make a purchase. Then, if we decide we don’t like what we purchased, we return it and move on.

Isn’t that the way dating sites work? Men and women browse around looking at the “merchandise,” find someone that looks interesting, try them on for size, and then they drop out of the relationship as easily as they got into it, often the same way they got into it, by e-mail. It’s too easy. If I meet her online, I can drop her online goes the subliminal thinking.

As long as you are good with that, and you know it going in, then fine. But if you are looking for someone who is in it for the long haul, you will have to lower your expectations of any individual you meet and be very patient in the process, knowing that you might get exchanged at any moment. The system itself is working against you.

It’s not just in the dating process, of course, but in every aspect of life, we want to know if the people we invest in are in it for the long haul. On a national level, it should be obvious that we don’t want allies bailing out when the firefight begins.

Likewise, a business doesn’t want a new hire to leave right after he reaches the point of productivity. Unfortunately, the reverse doesn’t seem to be true in most cases. That is, many companies demonstrate that they aren’t in it for the long haul with their staff. They start laying people off as soon as the going gets tough.

Survivors need people who are in it for the long haul. For that matter, everyone does.

Let me mention, again, one of my life’s theme verses of Scripture.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.[1]

God is in it for the long haul. You don’t have to wonder about it. No matter how bad the choices we make, or what life throws at us, God is hanging in with us.

That is something we can hold on to. It keeps us living with hope. Even when life seems to toss us aside like some unwanted garment.

[1] Romans 8:28


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The Big Picture

11 03 2010

[Note: The following was written in January, 2001 as part of a a devotional series for a Christian radio station in Atlanta. We’ve all been through a lot since then, but I could have written it yesterday and it wouldn’t be more relevant. I will be posting some of these earlier writings from time to time…]

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

Romans 8:28

It’s been said many times “things aren’t always what they seem” and most of us know just how true that is. We have all experienced a situation that could easily have been misinterpreted by someone who didn’t know the whole story. Such is the danger of shortsightedness. At any given moment, we are living out only a small part of a much bigger picture. Sometimes we have to step back and look at the big picture to understand some of the details.

For example, look very closely at a small spot on a photograph or painting. What you see looks dark and muddled–it doesn’t make much sense. As you back up and widen your view, however, you see that that blob of dark gray suddenly has some texture and highlights. It starts to look a little like fur. You broaden your view even more and see that spot of gray is part of a dog. Back up even more and that dog is sitting happily at the feet of a little girl. As you take in the entire picture, you see that the dog and the girl are part of a family enjoying a beautiful day at the beach. Now you can see how important the big picture is. What first looked like a dark spot is actually part of a delightful scene.

As hard as it is to understand, that is how life is. Sometimes we are experiencing only the small dark patches of life—sometimes lots of small dark patches. If we could step back far enough to see the entire scene of God’s plan, however, we would know that those little dark spots are part of a great and glorious scene. God is working in all things–even the gray spots–for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

Through His Word, we are given a glimpse of the whole picture if we can take it in:

For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.[1]

In other words, God’s plan is a really big picture. It spans all eternity, and nothing we see or experience in this life is sufficient to give us a sense of it. So remember the next time life seems dark and God seems absent, that things aren’t always what they seem.

[1] Romans 8:29-30


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“La Boca del Infierno”

8 03 2010

Twelve years ago, I went on a group trip to Nicaragua. One of the many things about the country that fascinated me was the large number of volcanoes that dotted the landscape. The largest volcano in the country was very near the little town of Esteli where we stayed. It was always in view and was a magnificent site even from a distance.

On the last day of the trip, our group was given a tour of the area around the capital city of Managua including a trip up to the top of an active (or at least seriously smoking) volcano, in Masaya. There was no life anywhere near that mass of rock—no animals, no plants, nothing but us awe-struck tourists. Once we reached the top, we looked down over the edge into the volcano. It was a stunning sight, and there is no way to adequately describe the feeling I got when I looked down into that deep, dark, smoke-filled gaping hole in the earth.

In the 16th Century, the Spaniards looked into it and promptly named it “La Boca del Infierno” – The Mouth of Hell. Believing that this was indeed the gateway to Hell, Father Francisco Bobadilla placed a cross on the crater lip to exorcise the devil. Although the original Bobadilla cross is long gone, the caretakers keep one there in its place. (You never know if Father Bobadilla might have been right.)

Nearby, however, is another fascinating sight—a large crater that had once been a volcano. But where there was once smoke and fire, there is now a deep lake of fresh water. Where there was once jagged rock, there is now grass and trees. The contrast between the active and inactive volcanoes is startling.

The differences between the two volcanoes offer a nice illustration of the transition from surviving to thriving. Some people might be surviving, but, like the smoking volcano, it’s a little scary. The struggles and disappointments of life have produced a life characterized by unwholesome talk, bitterness, and anger that steal the life out of everything around. When that is going on, it can be a little like looking into “La Boca de Infierno” can’t it? Sure it can. We’ve all been around someone like that…maybe we’ve been there ourselves.

But, like the old inactive volcano, it’s possible to experience a visible transformation from smoke and fire to peace and tranquility—from a life-draining existence to life giving living. That’s where we are headed. That’s where we want to live.

And, if I may, maybe we can learn a little from Father Bobadilla, who in his own way, had the right idea—the cross of Christ is the answer.

I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.[1]

[1] John 10:10


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Survival Mode and Changing Priorities

4 03 2010

“Well, it’s 1 a.m. Better go home and spend some quality time with the kids.”

Homer Simpson

The numbing and insulating characteristic of survival mode affects how we relate to others. It has the same effect on our day-to-day decisions about how we live. Our priorities and, to some extent, our values change…at least in the short term. What seems important when all is well doesn’t seem so when our world is crumbling.

The life of the survivor is typically one day at a time. And depending upon how intense our struggle, certain life issues that seemed so important at one time can become virtually irrelevant in our minds. Remember that “I don’t give a damn” mindset I mentioned in an earlier post? It alters what we consider to be significant.

Let me illustrate how this works. Let’s say a woman who has poured her heart and soul into family life and has always had her family as her highest priority, discovers that her husband is leaving her. Or, perhaps her husband becomes very ill. Or, maybe she herself becomes very ill. Any of these developments, or a host of others, could affect how she feels about soccer practice, a tidy house, or spending hours in the kitchen.

That’s the small stuff. Under certain circumstances, she might go so far as to shift her focus from family to a completely different and possibly unhealthy lifestyle. Bars, booze, and wild living might replace walking the dog, gardening, or even career on her “to do” list. Such changes can be swift and radical, or subtler, but they can happen nonetheless. And they can happen to anyone suffering from any crisis.

As we live in survival mode, our priorities can shift our thinking to a couple of extremes that I’ll call fatalism or euphoria.

Fatalism is an extremely heavy feeling with an “I don’t care what happens” mindset, because we are convinced that a happy life is elusive and is forever out of reach. Needless to say erratic and possibly destructive behavior can result.

Many of us can experience times of fatalistic feelings, particularly when life seems to be one disappointment after another. I’m not referring necessarily to suicidal thoughts, though that certainly would be a form of this. But instead, I want you to see how the survivor mode with its “don’t give a damn” characteristics, can lead us to think everything in life is dark and futile. The result is a dramatic change in priorities and how we experience life each day.

Since happiness, we convince ourselves, is not available, we tend to align our lives around what it takes to survive rather than what might bring us long term happiness and fulfillment. The positive people and places are disregarded and we just get up everyday and survive. In fact, we might even start to resent the happy people and events we come across. It’s a dark place and not where we want to be even for a short time, much less for the rest of our life.

The opposite, but just as unhealthy, extreme of fatalism is a form of euphoria. A survivor might live with a strange “so what?” feeling to deal with pain. It issues from the same “don’t give a damn” mindset and the change in priorities that cause certain behaviors might not be altogether different. The bars, the booze, and the wild living might still become a part of our lifestyle, but it’s because we are numbly euphoric rather than fatalistic. In fact, life might very well take the form of one endless party to the exclusion of everything that’s important.

A person that is not living in survival mode, on the other hand, tends to keep emotions, priorities, and behaviors balanced and in check. That’s how life is lived for the better and how we best avoid doing and saying things we might later regret.

It’s amazing how the mind can adapt our lifestyle to our surroundings, like a chameleon, in order to shield us from things that will hurt us. Like the walls of The Fortress, these temporary defenses are not characteristics we want to live by. In fact, both the walls of The Fortress and the chameleon-like adaptation can cause their own set of problems.

Have you ever temporarily become someone you aren’t in order to escape your issues? Of course you have. You’re a survivor.

The pain and problems we endure will forever affect us—either for the good or the bad. Thriving is allowing our scars to move us toward the person we were always intended to be. Surviving just nurses open wounds and takes painkillers.


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Surviving With or Without God

1 03 2010

A couple of weeks ago I was somewhat saddened to learn that one of my very first subscribers (who I didn’t know) had unsubscribed. Horrors! Was it something I said? Later that day, however, I got a new subscriber (who I also didn’t know). All was well again in Blog Land.

My analytical mind was trying to figure out why the one person dropped the subscription. Obviously, this blog doesn’t appeal to everyone. It was never intended to. Yet, this particular subscriber waited quite some time before letting go of it. Why? I asked myself.

If I had thousands of readers, I wouldn’t have ever noticed that one left. But that isn’t the case. Every reader is precious to me, if for no other reason than each and every post is a little piece of my soul, so there is at least a smidgeon of intimacy in the post and read transaction.

There is obviously no way I could know the real reason that the reader decided this blog was no longer of interest. It could be something as simple as not having enough time to fool with it. Maybe it stopped meeting a need and it disappeared off the priority reading list. Perhaps I wasn’t talking about a specific topic enough, like divorce for example. Or, the reader could have simply decided she didn’t like it, perish the thought.

I think, however, it might have something to do with the transition I made into writing about the role of God and faith in our surviving. If you go back and read the earlier posts, you’ll see that God doesn’t really make an entrance in the beginning.

There is a reason for that. There are survivors who have faith and survivors who don’t. To assume that one must have faith in order to survive painful experiences is to deny the human resilience given to us by our Creator. Plus, there are some common threads shared by most all survivors, and I want to explore those.

As I reveal in some of my posts, I have gone through times when I didn’t want a devotional. I didn’t want a sermon. I didn’t want a verse of Scripture. Even though I knew that all of those things were important. My hope is that this project will meet   people where they are at any level of surviving, whether they are walking with God, or whether they are angry, depressed, and struggling with faith.

Having said that, one wouldn’t have to read too far to learn that I believe that faith in God, specifically as he is revealed to us in Jesus Christ, is ultimately the key to moving beyond surviving to thriving. We can talk about the psychological impact of painful experiences (and I do so at length), but until we bring God into the mix, it is virtually impossible to find any purpose or hope in them.

So as the writer and director of this surviving 2 thriving experiment, I walk a line between the gut level responses most people have to the pain that life dishes out, and the faith response that looks beyond circumstances to hope and sees a higher purpose in the experiences of life. Thus, I run the risk that people of faith will think I’m not spiritual enough, and others will think I’m too preachy. What’s a man to do?

Truthfully, on the whole, this blog will be much more about faith and hope, than it will be about human determination or psychological explanations (I’m no Dr. Phil). And that’s because the only explanation for my undertaking this project is that it is what God wants me to do. And the reason he wants me to do it, is to give hope to hurting people.

I have been down a rather unusual path, and I believe have a unique perspective on this subject. This blog will not always read like a typical daily devotional. Nor will it frequently seem to read like a pop psychology newsletter. (There are resources available in both of those categories.)

From the beginning to it’s end, whenever that might be, this blog is about facing the hurts and disappointments of life with a raw realness. But doing so with faith that God is with us and for us… no matter how we feel about that on any given day.

So, I win some and lose some (subscribers). No doubt that my writing will not be spiritual enough on some days for some readers and way too “religious” on most days for others. That’s just where I am with this thing. I believe it’s where God wants me. It’s why he told me to do it. I guess I’ll keep writing until I have nothing else to say about it, or until God tells me I’m done.

I hope you will keep reading until he tells you the same.


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